Trust the Process; A Spiritual Lesson in Sewing

There is a mug a Barnes and Noble that I have seen on several occasions but I haven't bought it...yet. The only extraordinary thing about the mug is three little words that appear in white letters: Trust The Process.

I actually think about those three words quite often. Last night, decided to get started on the shopping cart seat cover I am sewing for Becca. I bought it in one of those little kits you can get at the fabric store. It came with two pieces of fabric, a length of elastic, and instructions. So I'm thinking, "How hard can this be?" HA!

In reality it's a really simply constructed item.  The problem is I can't quite envision how or why the instructions come together. I've read over them several times and I just can't quite seem to wrap my brain around why I have to do things in the order they are given. Isn't there an easier way? I have done this with every pattern or sewing project I have ever taken on and usually it ends up with lots of ripped out seams and frustration.

This time while I was working those three little words popped into my head: Trust The Process. So I stopped trying to look long term and decided to work on one instruction at a time. It's taking me a bit longer but I haven't had to rip things out because I thought I could take a short cut or that my way made more sense.

As I was thinking about all of this and Proverbs 3:4-7 came into my head;

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.

This is a struggle for me not only in sewing but in daily life. Don't get me wrong I really, really want to trust in God and follow Him but somehow my brain jumps ahead to the end and I see shortcuts and ways that seem to make more sense. Just like in sewing when I try to do it my way I end up with a lot of ripped out seams, frustration, and things that just turn out plain ugly. 


Today I will try again to slow down and trust the process. He has a plan and lessons for me along the way as long as I trust in Him with all my heart and lean not on my own understanding. 


Peace.

Survival vs Thriving,,,,

I've been thinking about this concept of survival vs thriving for a long time.  It seems as though I've spent most of my life in survival mode, "I just need to get through this crisis, so I can move on to the next."  This was my life growing up.  Where are we going to get food from today?  How drunk is mom going to be?  Will she be a happy drunk or will she get mean?  How am I going to pay for college?  Where's the rent money going to come from?  You get the point.  I learned to live in survival mode.  This was my day to day existence. 


I did have a safe place however, my friend Melissa's house.  That was my place of refuge.  When I was there I was loved and cared for. I was allowed to be a kid.  I didn't worry about food, bills, or if I was going to be abused that day.  It was wonderful and it was my lifeline to a world outside of my own.  A world where survival wasn't the goal; thriving was.  I am so grateful for that chance to see that life could be different. I sincerely believe I would not be where I am today with out that place of safety and refuge.


God has really been moving my heart about our appointment here in Waterloo.  Our move here was surrounded by unexpected circumstances at a very odd time.  I don't think we were mentally prepared nor were our people. This was no one's fault, it was just a crazy set of circumstances. I described our arrival in Waterloo like being put into a large dark crate spun around several times and dropped off in the middle of day in China.  It really was that disorienting.  Our people were confused and we were confused.  Everyone went into survival mode. 

We've been in survival mode for the last two years.  Just trying to figure it out day to day and learning about each other. Has it been difficult?  ABSOLUTELY! There have been days when Rob and I have thought about throwing the towel in.  I've argued with God, "Surely we aren't the ones to do this job!"  I'm sure our people have had those moments as well.  Some have thrown the towel in, but most have stuck with us (for which I am profoundly grateful).  However, I do think that this period of survival mode was necessary.  Just like the Israelites wandering in the desert for 40 years, this desert has been a place of learning, growth, and refining. Now it's time to leave that desert and enter the Promised Land.

You can only live in survival mode for so long.  God is ready to move us all forward.  No more excuses, just results. 

When you're in survival mode, the only thing you can think about is getting out alive.  It is impossible to appreciate what God is doing when you're in the middle of it. At this moment I am thankful for that oppurtunity for growth but I'm dancing with joy as I enter the promised land.

Now it's time to thrive!

Back in the saddle...

The Garden

Last year we put in a small raised bed so that we could have a little vegetable garden.  I didn't know much about gardening and we planted things sort of haphazardly.  We got lots of squash, a few cukes, and little else.  This year I took a little more organized approach and here is what we have so far.

Lots and lots of tomatoes this year! Last year we only got a couple because it was so cold. 

This little yellow flower will be a cucumber.  Amazing!

These flowers will be beans. 

Nathan is so excited that the tomato plants are as tall as he is. 

This is ONE zucchini plant!  Look at the size of those leaves!!

Our first zucchini!  We ate it with pasta.  Yumm....

 

One of my potted Gerbers.  Totally makes me happy!  

 

And last but not least one of our nuts!  Nathan took this picture and it just makes me laugh so I thought I would share it with the world. Karin Rowe you are awesome!

 

Be it ever so humble...

 Growing up we moved a lot.  Granted we stayed in the same city but every couple of years we would move to a new house.  I never really felt like I had a place that I could put roots down or really call home.  When I married my husband and we ventured off on our own all that changed.  His parents house really became home to me.  It was the place that we could always return to, to relax and feel safe and loved.  This was an entirely new experience for me and sometimes still catches me wonderfully off guard. 


Yesterday my mother-in-law, Rob, Nathan, and I all went tubing down the Muskegon River.  Other than a sunburn and getting a little far behind the rest of the group I had an amazing time.  There was however one moment where I was wonderfully caught off guard.  Floating down the river all by myself, I looked up into the canopy of trees and heard Rob and Nathan giggling and splashing in the background, and realized how familiar and right everything felt at that exact moment.  All too often I feel like I'm just visiting, at that moment I felt like I was home.  Here is the most amazing thing, while it felt really good to be surrounded by things familiar I realized that it wasn't the location that made me feel like I was at home, it was being with my son, and husband and mother-in-law. 

A sense of home isn't about location but family.  Most people figure this out quickly, but for a girl who really had no experience with neither growing up, it was an epiphany.

Thank you God for beautiful moments of growth.

Jumping off the hamster wheel....

This week Rob and I have jumped off the hamster wheel that is our crazy lives for a little respite.  We are on vacation spending time with our family, just trying to catch our breath.

It's amazing the things that God is saying when you finally get away from the noise and craziness to hear Him. 

I'm still processing how and what He said to me at Congress and all of the little things He's been saying through the noise. I hope to share several times this week about being yourself, resting in Him, digging into the Scriptures, friendship, the passing of time, and maybe even a few pictures of my aprons that I'll be working on.  

Praising God for an extended Sabbath rest and looking forward to sharing what God is doing!

No excuses....

Usually when I am feeling any type of negative emotion, ie. anger, sadness, disappointment, frustration, etc, that is caused by another individual or group of individuals I make excuses and don't allow myself to feel that emotion.  I tell myself the other party couldn't possibly have meant it that way, or maybe I'm just being a baby and I need to put my big girl pants on and deal with it. 

Well, in an effort to "live honestly", I just want to say publicly.....I"m angry, hurt, and disappointed.  For all of you TSA folks out there, it has nothing to do with The Army.  (I thought that I should say that so tongues don't start wagging.  :) )

No excuses, no apologies, just what I feel. 

Am I supposed to feel better now?